Who is Mary-Rose?
‘Who is Mary-Rose? I am the Founder of Rhodi Bloom and these days I am also a mum of a toddler while studying to become a Pregnancy Yoga Teacher and Infant Massage Instructor. Oh and trying to keep us all safe from COVID too. Oh and launching Rhodi Bloom too!
My background is Veterinary, but I knew once I met Rhodi that I wanted to change paths. As I said above, I am studying to become a Pregnancy Yoga Teacher currently. I hope to add to this to a qualification in Pregnancy Loss (Which I need to find first!) as I would hope that when I am teaching pregnancy yoga I could engage with anyone who has experienced a loss or is experiencing a loss and help them. I am also newly qualified as a Baby Massage Instructor and I host courses teaching parents how to massage their baby for bonding and interaction, amongst tonnes of other benefits. This is the happy side of my job! I would also love in the future to train as a Post Natal and a Kids Yoga Teacher. I see myself as eventually having a hub for before, during and after baby and beyond! Someday I’ll get there!
With regards to the experience of losing Rhodi. For a full year after I was not myself. I would go to work. Go out with friends. Smile, laugh. But a big jigsaw piece of me had gone. My close friends noticed but most people thought I was dealing fine. I felt I looked older, I felt older, I felt I had received a sucker punch that day that was continually hitting me day after day as the experience replayed each time in my mind.
For many years I was of the belief that you must plough through all these feelings. Chin up and carry on. Don’t let people see you cry. Get straight back to work. Be the strong one. I practiced Yoga every now and then, is that not enough I thought? Suddenly, my body had enough and decided to say no. I began to experience panic attacks, anxiety, Agoraphobia.
While still working in Veterinary I would be attending many treatments outside of my working hours. I began talking to a counsellor, I found this helpful and cried a lot but I didn’t feel it was fixing anything. I would go for a massage; I would feel good but again not solving anything. I tried Reiki, a type of Chakra energy cleansing treatment, I am not educated in how it works but I do know I felt amazing after every session of it. Acupuncture I found very helpful for anxiety and knowing pressure points to use in a stressful situation. Essential oils I still use daily, as well as smelling yummy, they can help for stress relief, calming and relaxation amongst other things. I also attend regular Yoga classes. I find this great exercise and to be honest can’t wait for the relaxation at the end! I eventually tried Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. I found this one of the best treatments I have used. It is basically like retraining your brain and telling yourself you are calm; you can handle a panic attack when they come. It is also homework based, so each week I felt a sense of achievement from these tasks. I have not needed CBT in a long time now, but I do make sure to look after myself, mentally and physically. I keep a monthly journal where at the beginning of each month I make a list of things I want to accomplish that month. I check in halfway through the month and make changes if needed and then at the end of the month I see what I accomplished and get ready for the next new month and new opportunities. I take salt baths, light candles, play my favourite music, treat myself to good food, lather on delicious moisturisers and most importantly take a step back, look around me and be grateful for all of the gorgeous and loving people and things in my life.
It’s hard to stay positive in hard times but if you do it for long enough, one day it becomes the norm!
As I said before, I am no expert in any of this, I only speak from my own personal experiences and what works for me. It may well not be your cup of tea but there is a good chance it might be and if it helps one other person to pick themselves up then that would be great